all the stars jumping in through the window
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Post by Chase Anderson on Nov 21, 2016 8:49:05 GMT
“ I'M CARRYING YOUR LIGHT. RIP IT'S SO LATE IM SORRY. also chase feels like a horrible person rn omg anriaaaaaa [attr="class","cupcakescroll"]Too many things had happened in that moment.
Chase had smelled blood, it's scent metallic and sharp within the air. Despite himself, and his resolve to run, he had looked back, even if it was only for a moment. Anria had been hurt and was bleeding- he needed to know it wasn't too bad before he left.
He stopped when he'd spotted the rock in her hand, though, raised to strike him down. He practically choked on his own breath and froze, staring at it in horror, then at her with the same expression. Chase knew he'd caused damage, but it couldn't have been enough to justify this. And maybe he deserved it- a rock to the face -but that didn't make it right. He didn't keep running, though, even as he saw that she was about to attack him. He had stopped to see if she would do it.
To see if she would prove him right.
But then Anria faltered, and so did Chase, surprised by what seemed like yet another change of heart. The rock, red with blood- her hand must've been cut by it -fell from her grasp and hit the ground. And then she hugged him, instead of the other way around. It also seemed desperate, how tightly she was holding onto him. He wondered if this was something he needed, or something that she needed. Maybe it was a little bit of both.
And yet, despite that, he didn't return the gesture. He started too, but then stopped. She was sorry- he knew that. She hadn't hurt him- at least, not with the rock. But she'd been close. And after having his trust shattered like that, so soon after he'd given her the benefit of the doubt....
...it still stung. He could forgive her, and he was happy to know that redemption might be closer than he'd thought, but after all....this? This time, even he needed time to warm up to her completely, again. This was a step forward, though- the problem was that the last time she had taken a step forward, she'd taken two back, and the same thing had happened before. Chase was worried that it would happen again, and if he let his guard down...he could get hurt. In both senses of the word.
Chase wanted to believe in Anria. He really did. He just didn't know if he could handle it if she turned on him again. It would be too hard. He needed to know that she wouldn't before he could trust her again.
"I know," he said, and though he didn't push her, he leaned away slightly. "I...am too." He stepped away, out of her reach, as gently as he could. He stared at the ground, ashamed of himself- of his own fear. But Anria had taken his trust and stomped on it one too many times, and he couldn't let it happen again. He just- he needed to be sure first, and everytime he thought he had been before, he'd been wrong. "I'm sorry. I just-" He sighed, still avoiding her eyes. "You almost- just now, you-" He couldn't say it out loud- you almost hurt me. With a rock. "And you didn't- you didn't, which is great, but you were so close and-"
"I can't do this again. Not yet." Chase rubbed one of his eyes, still red from having cried. He wasn't used to that- being so open about how he felt, being so raw and exposed. But this was the one time he needed to put his foot down. He couldn't just...brush it off. He needed time. He couldn't stay around Anria if she made him afraid. "One day-" One day, maybe he wouldn't be afraid of her. "Just...not now." [newclass=.cupcakescroll::-webkit-scrollbar]width:3px;[/newclass][newclass=.cupcakescroll::-webkit-scrollbar-thumb]background:#ddd;[/newclass] |
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Anria is lonely, you meet Anria, yes? Yes
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Post by Anria Liana on Nov 22, 2016 4:42:01 GMT
SEARCHING IN THE DARKNESS WE ARE CREATURES OF THE NIGHT RUNNING FROM THE DAY For the smallest fraction of a second, just a moment there, Anria had let herself feel, feel real feelings. She was senseless, confused, unstable in the least, even as she had stood there for that short time, just pouring her tears out on his shoulder, as he stood there, thinking of what to do.
Chase didn't hug her back. That couldn't be right, that's not how its supposed to go. He stepped away from her, in her eyes, as though she were contaminated. Perhaps she was, but she couldn't hear what he was saying, words, what was he saying? Anria's head pounded, her lips quivered, her eyes blurred her vision with more tears since her parents had died. She felt her nerves go ice cold, her blood swarming her veins in hot, frenzied bursts.
"No," it was a whisper, delicate, maybe she hadn't even said anything at all. But her words kept coming, louder, angrier. "No! NO!" She pointed a finger at him, bit her lip until it hurt, stumbled away with her back to him. As she clutched her temple in fists, Anria, with heavy breathing, paced in micro circles. "No, this isn't right, this isn't right!!"
Then she was looking at him again, with those dangerous eyes, and she screamed it all over again. Oblivious to the world, she staggered drunkenly to her family's memorial.
She kicked it. And the stones fell over, the flowers shredded, and though Anria wasn't necessarily clean about it, she ruined it, so quickly what had been built with loving hands.
When she fell to the ground a few feet away, pounding her fists in the dirt, undoubtedly breaking a few bones, Anria found herself uncertain how she could be consoled at that point, if she wanted to, if it was even possible.
After a brutal minute, she had settled to the point of whimpering, her forehead pressed to the ground, wanting nothing more than a path to own again.
Welp. Have fun with that one. My heart..............
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all the stars jumping in through the window
Intermediate Member
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Post by Chase Anderson on Dec 9, 2016 6:06:53 GMT
“ I'M CARRYING YOUR LIGHT. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH [attr="class","cupcakescroll"]Chase visibly winced each time Anria raised her voice, so desperate and full of hurt, pain that he had caused. He felt like the worst person in existence. How could he have done this? He didn't think Anria had been necessarily crying for help, but she had needed it and he had just turned his back on her.
Willingly. It hadn't been an accident. He'd made the decision himself. He'd practically led her on before casting her aside, and now she was cracking. And why, why on Earth had he done this? Why had he made the decision to break somebody, right after convincing them to open up?
For a long moment, he forgot. Then he looked up, and met those wild eyes Anria was aiming at him, and he remembered.
Chase had done this because Anria scared him. Because she was unpredictable- she had proven to be on the edge of violence, and she had almost hurt him too many times. Now, more than ever, he couldn't be so close to somebody who was on the edge of actually attacking him. He had lost his mother. He was just finding himself again- Anria wasn't the only one here who was hurting, and who was fragile.
But was his well-being worth all that? Chase had struggled with self-worth too many times in his life, put others before him time after time, and so many times had he forgotten that sometimes he needed a break, too. Was this the right way, though? Was this the right choice?
Yes. He wanted to believe that. Anria was dangerous. She could get better, but if Chase was at risk while that was happening, what good would that do anyone? But it didn't feel right. It felt so wrong, so against everything he stood for.
"I'm so sorry," Chase whispered, wondering if she could even hear his apology in the midst of her own break-down. He couldn't bring himself to leave, not even now. How could he, when she was like this? It was because she was like that, he should have left, but he couldn't. He sank to the ground, sitting there, holding his head in his hands. "I sorry..." he said to nobody, and yet, at the same time, to everyone he had ever wronged. "I don't know what to do..." [newclass=.cupcakescroll::-webkit-scrollbar]width:3px;[/newclass][newclass=.cupcakescroll::-webkit-scrollbar-thumb]background:#ddd;[/newclass] |
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Anria is lonely, you meet Anria, yes? Yes
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Post by Anria Liana on Dec 10, 2016 18:03:06 GMT
SEARCHING IN THE DARKNESS WE ARE CREATURES OF THE NIGHT RUNNING FROM THE DAY Something someone had said, something her mother had said, came back to Anria. Helping others helps yourself. For years she had lived by similar mantras, but now, listening to the crumbling Chase behind her, she found a new meaning. It had always been Anria's way to use people's pain to her advantage, and that's how she had taken her mother's words from all those many, many years ago. Yet, as she knelt there, she realized that, perhaps, it had a more enlightening meaning. Redemption, that was what her mother had intended the outcome of compassion to be.
"Helping others helps yourself," Anria hissed, digging her long nails into her palms. She stood abruptly and glared over her shoulder at Chase. "Help yourself. You seem to like it that way." Anria, unsure whether her words were intended for herself or for Chase, and unwilling to find out, began storming off.
IDK if you want to end it here or continue, depends on how you think Chase would react, I guess. I love this thread so much, so I'd be totally fine with continuing it if you wanted, but I left it open in case it seems final. |
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